Runner-up Miss Moosejaw 1987

Dear Dads

June 16th, 2017

Dear Dads,

As a recent addition to your ranks (I’ve been one of you for 2 years, 9 months and 16 days as I type this) I have to ask, do all of you like dadhood as much as I do?

I mean sure, there are times when I feel like I’m in a little over my head. Like when my now 2 year, 9 month and 16 day old daughter asked me a while back “daddy, what’s that thing outside of your vagina?” Then there are the times when I am in WAY over my head, like when she yelled to me in a store “Hey Steve! Come over here! And bring your wallet!”

There’s also the moments when I feel utterly helpless when my little girl is bawling her eyes out for her mommy and when I feel a “tad” over protective, such as when little boys approach her and I scream at them, “HEY, KEEP IT IN YOUR PAMPERS THERE BUDDY!”

But all in all, being a dad is the best job I’ve ever had. It’s made me learn things I thought I would never know how to do. Like how to be patient, how to curse and swear without using actual curse and swear words and how to listen to the same song several times in a row without going (completely) insane.

It’s also made me realize how many more skills my dad has accumulated in his life than I have. He has built a LOT of really nice stuff out of wood. He’s shot a gun with reasonable precision (except for that one time he shot himself in the hand. But thankfully it was a pellet gun. And it was “only to show you boys how dangerous a gun can be”). He is a cunning cribbage player, a proficient plumber, an above-average angler and above all, an honest-to-God good man.

Of all these skills, I’m catching up on the cribbage front and getting better at the goodness.

But I think when it comes right down to it, the best thing you can do as a dad is to not look down on others and never give up on your own family.

Me and my dad 'Slim'

Me and my dad ‘Slim’

We’ve all got different skills and yes, some dads’ skills are “greater” than others. But the dads that realize being a father is the greatest job in the world are the ones doing it right.

I’m very thankful to my dad John “Slim” Patterson for teaching me so many things. Even though I’m still I’m an awful angler, a woeful woodworker and a pathetic plumber, I at least know how to not be an arsehole (most of the time) how to put other arseholes in their place when need be and I will always listen to what my child has to say and encourage her (except when she calls me “Steve”. We’re going to work on that.)

So to all the dads out there who have embraced fatherhood, whether you’re still carrying your children around on your shoulders literally or made them the people who can carry others on theirs, here’s to a helluva Father’s Day this Sunday! I guess you could take the “day off” if you wanted to. But why would anyone want to take a day off from the best job in the world?

Yours truly,

Steve Patterson

Slim’s son. Scarlett’s Dad.


Let the discussion begin!

  • Annabelle Lee Wright - June 17, 2017 at 6:58 am - Reply

    When I can laugh out loud, blink real fast and sob audibly, I know I’ve just read something special. Thank you, Steve, for putting that kinda combo of words together here.

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